真正的强大，是敢于面对那个脆弱而不完美的自己
理财鱼小提示：真正的强大，是敢于面对那个脆弱而不完美的自己
"That’s not our job. Our job is to look and say, You know what? You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging. "That’s our job. Show me a generation of kids raised like that, and we’ll end the problems, I think, that we see today.
那不是我们的任务。我们的任务是注视着她，对她说，“你知道吗？你并不完美，你注定要奋斗，但你值得被爱，值得享有归属感。”这才是我们的职责。给我看用这种方式培养出来的一代孩子，我保证我们今天有的问题会得到解决。
原文
So, I’ll start with this: a couple years ago, an event planner called me because I was going to do a speaking event. And she called, and she said, I’m really struggling with how to write about you on the little flyer. And I thought, "Well, what’s the struggle?"
那我就这么开始吧：几年前，一个活动策划人打电话给我，因为我当时要做一个演讲。她在电话里说：“我真很苦恼该如何在宣传单上介绍你。”我心想，怎么会苦恼呢？
And she said, "Well, I saw you speak, and I’m going to call you a researcher, I think, but I’m afraid if I call you a researcher, no one will come, because they’ll think you’re boring and irrelevant."
她继续道：“你看，我听过你的演讲，我觉得我可以称你为研究者，可我担心的是，如果我这么称呼你，没人会来听，因为大家普遍认为研究员很无趣而且脱离现实。”
And I was like, "Okay."And she said, "But the thing I liked about your talk is you’re a storyteller. So I think what I’ll do is just call you a storyteller." And of course, the academic, insecure part of me was like,
好。然后她说：“但是我喜欢你的演讲，就跟讲故事一样很吸引人。我想来想去，还是觉得称你为讲故事的人比较妥当。
"You’re going to call me a what?" And she said, "I’m going to call you a storyteller." And I was like, "Why not ’magic pixie’?"
”而那个做学术的，感到不安的我脱口而出道：“你要叫我什么？”她说：“我要称你为讲故事的人。"我心想：”为什么不干脆叫魔法小精灵？“
I was like, "Let me think about this for a second." I tried to call deep on my courage. And I thought, you know,I am a storyteller. I’m a qualitative researcher. I collect stories; that’s what I do. And maybe stories are just data with a soul.
我说：”让我考虑一下。“我试着鼓起勇气。我对自己说，我是一个讲故事的人。我是一个从事定性研究的科研人员。我收集故事；这就是我的工作。或许故事就是有灵魂的数据。
And maybe I’m just a storyteller. And so I said, "You know what? Why don’t you just say I’m a researcher-storyteller." And she went, "Ha ha. There’s no such thing."
或许我就是一个讲故事的人。于是我说：”听着，要不你就称我为做研究兼讲故事的人。“她说：”哈哈，没这么个说法呀。“
So I’m a researcher-storyteller, and I’m going to talk to you today -- we’re talking about expanding perception -- and so I want to talk to you and tell some stories about a piece of my research that fundamentally expanded my perception and really actually changed the way that I live and love and work and parent.
所以我是个做研究兼讲故事的人，我今天想跟大家谈论的--我们要谈论的话题是关于拓展认知--我想给你们讲几个故事是关于我的一份研究的，这份研究从本质上拓宽了我个人的认知，也确确实实改变了我生活、爱、工作还有教育孩子的方式。
And this is where my story starts. When I was a young researcher, doctoral student, my first year, I had a research professor who said to us, Here’s the thing, if you cannot measure it, it does not exist. And I thought he was just sweet-talking me.
我的故事从这里开始。当我还是个年轻的博士研究生的时候，第一年，有位研究教授对我们说：”事实是这样的，如果有一个东西你无法测量，那么它就不存在。“我心想他只是在哄哄我们这些小孩子吧。
I was like, "Really?" and he was like, "Absolutely." And so you have to understand that I have a bachelor’s and a master’s in social work, and I was getting my Ph.D. in social work, so my entire academic career was surrounded by people who kind of believed in the "life’s messy, love it."
我说：“真的么？”他说：“当然。”你得知道我有一个社会工作的学士文凭，一个社会工作的硕士文凭，我在读的是一个社会工作的博士文凭，所以我整个学术生涯都被人所包围，他们大抵相信生活是一团乱麻，接受它。
And I’m more of the, "life’s messy, clean it up, organize it and put it into a ben to box." And so to think that I had found my way, to found a career that takes me -- really, one of the big sayings in social work is, Lean into the discomfort of the work.
而我的观点则倾向于，生活是一团乱麻，解开它，把它整理好，再归类放入便当盒里。我觉得我领悟到了关键，有能力去创一番事业，让自己--真的，社会工作的一个重要理念是置身于工作的不适中。
And I’m like, knock discomfort upside the head and move it over and get all A’s. That was my mantra. So I was very excited about this. And so I thought, you know what, this is the career for me, because I am interested in some messy topics.
我就是要把这不适翻个底朝天每科都拿到A。这就是我当时的信条。我当时真的是跃跃欲试。我想这就是我要的职业生涯，因为我对乱成一团，难以处理的课题感兴趣。
But I want to be able to make them not messy. I want to understand them. I want to hack into these things that I know are important and lay the code out for everyone to see.
我想要把它们弄清楚。我想要理解它们。我想侵入那些我知道是重要的东西把它们摸透，然后用浅显易懂的方式呈献给每一个人。
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